You were born into a society that comes with many pre-installed programs. One of which being “you need to be successful for people to like you.” It starts right at primary school, if not earlier. You immediately begin comparing your progress with the kid sitting next to you. “His writing is neater than mine, and she reads faster than I do. My parents will be disappointed.”
It all starts like this and snowballs from there. And before you know it, you find yourself fallen into the clutches of constant people-pleasing. Consequently, when you grow up, you feel that a thriving business, a marriage that looks wonderful to an outsider, a spotless career that goes only up and higher means you’re going to be approved and liked.
You feel like somethings are not right, but giving up and starting again would mean people you love will see you as a failure, which is a double-edged sword that cuts deep. On one side, there’s your personal and/or professional reputation, on the other, your happiness.
Choices, with a capital C
It’s hard to get rid of the program that was firmly pierced into your personality since the day you were born. But think this way; if you’re not happy, how can you give happiness to anyone else? How can you continue living the way you do, knowing that it’s making the emptiness in you bigger and bigger?
At some point, you have to make the hard choice and replace that program with the “follow what makes me happy and don’t worry about what others think.” And believe me, the sooner you make your choice, the sooner you’ll experience the biggest and best feeling of relief in the world.
Because by doing that, you release yourself from the tight ropes of constant people-pleasing, living the life for others, doing things and making decisions to feel loved, accepted and preferred.
Do you need to let go of some people in your life who’s opinions of your life path are affecting how you show up each day? So be it. And actually, you don’t even need to let them go. You only need to permit yourself not to worry about what they think of you. It might be one of the hardest things to do, but you’ll see that it’s also the most rewarding journey.
Now ask yourself;
- Are you aware of people that are holding you back from the things that you really want in your life?
- Do you worry about what other people think of your choices?
- Would you make different choices if you could let go of what other people think of you?
If one or more of your answers to these questions is YES, do something about it. Because time is ticking away, and not even a second will be back to you. Bite the bullet, make your choice and go for it. You can do it. You will do it.
Image by Free-Photos from Pixabay
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Wishing you calm and happiness,
Ipek
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